Girl Gossip, The most unanswered question to everyone and the thing that has made every man so confused and helpless. There are as always certain mysteries about women and one of them is their gossipping nature. Many men often fail to read between the lines (clearly understand) as to what a woman is saying and what she really means. This often leads to misunderstanding and chaos between the two. These misunderstandings often lead to drama and a lot of frustration. Hence, in this post, I will try to uncover the mysteries behind this natural phenomenon: Gossip Girl, What She Says And What She Means?
Women And Men Mindsets
If you all have gone through my second post:
“Women Behaviour When It Comes To A Relationship”.
You must be knowing that it is very necessary for women to express themselves. Be it any sort of problem or something else, sharing their feelings is of greater importance. To better understand Women Behaviour in detail, you can click the link below:
The thing is that for women, their sense of self-worth is defined by the quality of their relationships. For Women, Emotional fulfillment is of much greater importance rather than materialistic achievements.
Men, on the contrary, are different. Their mindsets are different. Men are more rationalized and logic-driven. Men process logic more easily as compared to emotions.
The thing is, that for men, their sense of self-worth is defined by successful completion of the tasks, to be simple, their self-worth depends on their achievements. Achievements can either be materialistic or non-materialistic. If a man has achieved more, he will feel much better about himself than a man who has achieved less or nothing.
To better understand Men Behaviour and how much important for them is their self-worth, go through the link below:
Same Words But Different Meanings
Men and women often speak the same words but in different contexts. Mostly women are more inclined on their emotional side while men are more inclined on their logical side. The words that they use might be the same but at the same time can be entirely different in meanings. They also many times perceive the words of the opposite sex which is in a way highly different than what the first person is trying to say.
Let’s understand by taking small examples from people’s daily life:
Gossip Girl And Overly Ambitious Boy: Scenario 1
What She Said: You NEVER take me out for dinner dates.
What He Understood: You don’t care for me. You’re a failure, you’re failing at your job. Your job is to love me and you are not doing it. You’re lazy, unromantic and boring.
What She Really Meant: She as a woman, didn’t expect you to take the word NEVER in a serious or literal manner. She was only asking you for your personal time. The only thing she needed was to feel close and to build intimacy. She was not blaming you. Intimacy and closeness are much of higher importance to her.
Gossip Girl And Overly Ambitious Boy: Scenario 2
What She Said: You don’t look after household chores, children, etc.
What He Understood: You’re irresponsible. I’m the one who looks after the home alone. You don’t know how to run a family. You’re inefficient.
What She Really Meant: She was overwhelmed by the daily tasks of the house. She wanted your help. The only thing she wanted was someone who could do the part of the household chores so that she could feel relaxed. She was not complaining.
Gossip Girl And Overly Ambitious Boy: Scenario 3
What She Said: I want more romance.
What He Understood: You don’t satisfy me. I don’t get turned on by you anymore. I wish you’d be like my friend’s husband. He loves his wife more. He is much romantic than you.
What She Really Meant: She meant that both of them were not able to spend much time together recently. She wanted to be caressed and felt. She wanted alone time. The only thing she wanted was to build intimacy.
Why Women Get Angry?
For women, unlike men, their emotional fulfillment is of much greater importance. Whenever a man ignores a woman’s plea, it makes her think that she is being neglected. She feels as if she is being isolated and cornered away. To them, materialistic achievements are of little or no importance. And if a man fails to emotionally satisfy her, she slowly starts to distance herself away.
“Lack of emotional fulfillment for a woman acts as a slow death for her”
Why Men Get Angry?
For a man, his sense of self-worth is much of greater importance. And their achievements helps them enhance their self-worth. Whenever a woman tries to say these things to a man (which is obviously unintentional), it makes him feel that he’s incompetent and a failure. If a man is blamed for not taking care of his wife/girlfriend, it is a direct attack on his capabilities. Men by nature are competent, they don’t want to lose. And whenever women say, “You never take me out for dinner dates”. It makes him realize that he is a failure. And when this failure tag sticks to his self-worth, a man acts like a mad person. Just Remember:
“A Man’s greatest fear is that he isn’t good enough or he’s incompetent”
Generalization Of Gossip Girl And Overly Ambitious Man
Since men are more logical and rationalized, hence they perceive their female partner’s statements solely based on the words she uses. They don’t try to connect to the emotional side of what a woman is saying. For them, everything works through proper logic. If they fail to build logic, they’ll fail to understand.
Women often speak through emotions and want the man to understand it.
To completely understand a woman’s point of view, learning to get a glimpse of emotion she is using behind her words is much of a smarter move for men. Instead of going through her words solely on rationalization and logic, trying to feel what she is going through, will definitely save your life.
Men and Women often conflict due to their difference in their mindsets. One is emotional, and the other is rational. And the problem with men and women is that they try to win logic over emotion and vice-versa instead of realizing that the person of the opposite sex has a different mindset.
Emotions VS Logic
“Logic is Emotionless and Emotion is Logic-less “
One can’t justify emotions with logic. Love can’t be defined by logic. It is a beautiful feeling that gives us a higher sense of self. Love gives us purpose. It gives meaning to our lives. Its intensity can never be measured using logical measuring instruments.
” No instrument is powerful enough to measure the intensity of love that a man or a woman has for each other”
Logic and emotions are totally opposites. Hence they don’t resemble each other in any manner.
“Winning Logic with Emotion Or Winning Emotion With Logic is an asshole’s move“
If a man tries to justify a woman’s emotion with his logic or if a woman tries to justify a man’s logic with her emotion, then both of them are the one that is mentioned above.
To a man, his home is just a property, he will sell it out only because he is getting a fair price in return. Absolute Logic and nothing else. And there’s nothing wrong with it.
To a woman, her home is more than just a property. A woman gives her entire dedication and energy in building that land, a livable place. She goes through so much in building that land that even if she gets more than the price of the land, she might not sell it. Perfect Emotional Attachment and nothing else. And same here, there’s nothing wrong with this.
Only failure to understand and lack of support to each other results in the failure of a relationship. Men want women to think rationally and women want men to think emotionally. This clash results in a war. And we all know, both parties always lose in wars.
Conclusion Of Gossip Girl And Overly Ambitious Boy
- Men are rational and logic-driven.
- Women are emotionally driven.
- Men find logic in everything, if you fail to provide logic, they’ll fail to understand.
- Women are in touch with their emotional side more than their logical side.
Instead of criticizing men and women for their rationalized and emotional behavior, we must try to understand each other better. Only through proper understanding and patience, a relationship will work out. These things certainly require time and practice, and what else you need is never giving up on your significant other.
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